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Patient to Dentist: "How much to get my teeth straightened ?" "Twenty thousand bucks" Patient heads for the door. Dentist to patient: "Where are you going?” "To a plastic surgeon to get my mouth bent."
J J J
A famous psychiatrist told his wife: "I feel down today, I am going to see my
colleague." Psychiatrist: “Yes! I know! But my colleague charges less than I do!"
J J J
Teacher: What are the people of Turkey called? Student: I don't know. Teacher: They are called Turks, now what are the people of Germany called? Student: They are called Germs.
J J J
Doctor, doctor, my little boy swallowed a bullet. What shall I do? Well, for a start, don't point him at me.
J J J
When the new patient was settled comfortably on the couch, the physiatrist began his therapy session, "I'm not aware of your problem, So you should start at the very beginning." "Of course." replied the patient. "In the beginning, I created the Heavens and the Earth..."
J J J
What is π?
Mathematician: "π is the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its
diameter."
J J J
An elderly and quite ill lady appeared in a hospital emergency room, having driven herself to the hospital and barely managing to stagger in from the parking lot.
The horrified nurse said, "Why didn't you call the emergency number 911 and
get an ambulance?"
J J J
A doctor goes into a restaurant, sits down and starts reading the menu. The
menu says: Waiter: “Are you kidding? Do you know how hard it is to clean one of them!?"
J J J
Little Johnny's teacher asks, "What is the chemical formula for water?" Little Johnny replies, "HIJKLMNO"!! The teacher, puzzled, asks, "What on Earth are you talking about?" Little Johnny replies, "Yesterday you said it was H to O!"
J J J
A patient is entering his psychiatrist's office when he sees an old friend.
"Hey Harry." He asks, "Are you coming or going?"
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